Spiritual Music Composer Oils Up Dick Before Hitting Record


Wheeling, WV - Alan Dubois knows how to get the right sound for his yoga and massage accompaniment music albums. He knows there will most likely be a didgeridoo, some trance drum beat, and a heaping pile of oil lavished on his half-hard dick.

Dubois says it wasn't until he poured generous amounts of lavender-scented massage oil on his perpetually aroused dick that he got the right sound for his music.

"I tried different drum sounds, different string instruments, but the answer turned out to be staring me in the face. As it happens, I must begin my music sessions with an ample amount of oil on my dick, which is always somewhat engorged, otherwise the vibe just won't be right for relaxation."

The revelation arrived to him by accident. He arrived to the music studio one afternoon after having just come from a group sex therapy session wherein all parties were lathered up in oil. He was to re-record some wind chimes that didn't sound quite right from the previous day's recording. This time it went swimmingly.

"The only difference was the fact that my penis was still wet from the excessive amount of oil that was used in the group sex therapy session. I ran a few more tests in the days that followed to confirm my suspicions and sure enough, the music I recorded on the days when my dick was oiled up were far superior - and more spiritual I might add - than the days when I was sans penis oil. It was night and day."

You've heard Dubois' music for sure, when you were face down on a massage table, or in shavasana at the end of a yoga class. His music pulsates with spirituality and some listeners have even claimed that their own penises were oiler after hearing his songs of the heart, from his album, "Songs of the Heart."