You want to protest Nazis, Donald Trump, corporate pollution, big pharma, but your intestines are so backed up all you can think about is staying home with a bottle of Colace and Metamucil® powder and watching Silkwood for the shower scenes.
You want to protest nonviolently, but you're thinking, "I have two weeks of burritos still in me."
The answer my friends is broken in the wind because this workshop is designed to give you the inner strength to protest nonviolently by creating the right bowel movements.
In this workshop you'll learn the following:
What Foods to Eat to Politically Zing Your Intestines
Your Window of Time to Effect Change Once You've Risen from the Toilet
What Corporations Don't Want You to Know About Your Feces
Why the Illuminati Doesn't Want You to Shit
How to Group-Shit
How to Stage a Shit-In
And that's just a taste!
This workshop is designed to give you that inner peace, that warm glow, that deep-rooted soul-affirming self-assurance that the right bowel movement can provide.
Scientists and spiritualists have long known that the right bowel movement can effect change but have kept these secrets from the public. We're releasing them!
If you walk into the bathroom feeling inspired to effect change in the world but walk out feeling worthless and filthy, then this is the workshop for you!