Polyamory Technical Institute

Whether you're tired of having sex with the same person or you yearn to be naked with other men and women where no one can tell whose semen is whose the time to register for classes at the Polyamory Technical Institute is NOW!

Don't haphazardly throw yourself into a polyamorous lifestyle without the right training or you could end up on the train tracks, cut up into pieces, eaten by birds and rodents. This is in fact our motto and while it's a long motto, it's effective.

Our teachers are the best and most experienced polyamory teachers you'll find in the whole universe. They have been having sex with multiple partners for years and are well-versed on touching all types of genitals.They can't wait to touch yours!

Courses include:

Balls for Men 101: Desensitizing the Male Genitalia for Straight Men

Many men enter the polyamorous fray without proper preparation. The first graze of another man's balls and they run screaming into a radiation shower. Male freshmen will hold their classmates' balls every day in ten minute intervals to de-stigmatize the aura around balls.

Let Ugly Work for You: Learn to Have Sex With Someone You Find Disgusting

We figure out your tastes and then we give you the exact opposite in this eye-opening workshop. You will be paired with a "poly-partner" for the class, and it's someone you will find repulsive. You will find many ugly people in the polyamorous love sessions in your life and the sooner you learn to have sex with them the happier you'll be. You might even be ugly yourself.

Shower Me with Semen, Let it Rain Vagina

In this wonderful workshop we pour gallons of semen and vaginal excretions over your body so you get a feel for texture, taste, and aroma. It's also important to release the neurotic need to know what the liquid you're swallowing and touching is or from whom it came.

To say we're excited to see you in our upcoming sessions is an understatement. Tittering with anticipation is more like it.

Get started on your polyamory degree TODAY to begin the constant, pulsating flow of blood to your penis, vagina, and ANUS!

Price: $350! Degrees are tax-deductible and recyclable. All instructors have herpes and/or anal warts.