Communal Bed Workshop

A large portion of the population suffers from separation anxiety. This could be due to general fear, free-floating anxiety, the inability to cope with life's difficulties, the dormant knowledge that dualistic reality is an illusion, OR it might mean that you didn't receive enough love in your pre-adolescent formative years.

The Communal Bed Workshop is designed to rejuvenate you, give you back the love you didn't receive when you needed it most. This is not just for new and/or established parents. The Communal Bed Workshop is for anyone and everyone who feels they need to reconnect with a parent-figure.

How it works: Participants will share a bed with a mix of 8 strangers, kids and adults.

Then what: Each week the participants will switch beds and meet a whole new group of bedmates.

Who Runs the show: A naked therapist is assigned to each bed to mediate and guide the bed discussions to ensure as much fear as possible is released.

Our therapists are licensed social workers as well as certified Clinical Communal Bed Coaches (CCBC). They are also master vegan chefs who will cook delicious vegan meals for you on the bed much like they do at Benihana.

What to talk about in bed: Bedmates are encouraged to talk about anything and everything to strengthen that bond of intimacy.

A "Clothing is Optional" policy is encouraged to nurture the love that can form when we break down the societal walls that keep us enslaved in shame and guilt.

Children will see penises and vaginas. We encourage parents to either show their children their genitals before arriving to the workshop and/or talk with them about the genitals they will see.

If nudity is uncomfortable for you or your family we still recommend this workshop because we think you clearly need it, but you may find it very uncomfortable; and your kids might find it uncomfortable as well.

All participants must undergo a thorough psychological exam to ensure they are of sound mind and body, have no criminal past, and are fond of hummus as there will be a lot of it.

Surrogate Breastfeeders Provided: Many of the adults who did not receive the appropriate amount of love in their childhood rave about our team of Surrogate Breastfeeders. These altruistic matriarchs embrace participants in a space of warmth, generosity, and forgiveness.

Many of our Surrogate Breastfeeder graduates have received promotions at their jobs, gotten married, and become airline pilots after leaving the workshop! How about them apples!

Price: $1500! Touch your skin & your heart with the skin and hearts of strangers.