Indian Man, Abeer Varma

I'm a marketing consultant

from East Lansing Michigan.

When did you first attain enlightenment?

I did not attain enlightenment.

You're Indian, right?


So your family must have been very proud when you met your guru as a small child and he showed you that this world is an illusion with the touch of his finger.

I don't have a guru and I'm not into spirituality.

Because you've moved beyond concepts and understand that this is a world of shadows.

Because I'm a marketing consultant from East Lansing Michigan, and my assistant told me you wanted to interview me about building your B2B sales.

What the hell is B2B sales?

It's when one business makes a commercial transaction with another. Like if you made pants and needed to buy buttons from another company.

What in god's name are you talking about?

That's what I do. I work with businesses to market their products to other businesses.

Look, is your third eye open to the entire universe or not?

The best I can do for you is build an online marketing campaign targeting specific industries.

You call yourself an Indian?

Yes, I am ethnically Indian.

You might want to start acting like it.